Communication skills

I have always been a weak speaker on stage, in public and family gatherings. I suffered a lot. I couldn’t convince my family in early days of my childhood to let me study in peace. I was sent to a boarding school where I had to sit on floor for 2 long restricted years. I underwent some difficulties and made it to a good university in Pakistan.

Next challenge was to face my university class fellows, teachers and again the same family members. I did not work on my communication skills that lead me to fighting for what was mine, every day. I wanted more of everything. Weaker communication skills impacted my childhood, teen hood and until recently my adult hood.

It had become hard to convince people of my intentions. My right intentions at times were perceived as wrong and evil plans. When I failed to convince others, I ended up fighting and disrespecting others.

How did I fix it?

I talked about only those things which are correct. Like I started talking about Quran, goodness and fixing the society. The ideas that can impact our lives. While I was struggling to establish my own luxuries through talking about only good things, I ended up learning to code. This incident of 2017, to learn to code, gave me an edge over most of the criticism around me. People I argued with before, did not know how to code. By making it possible for myself, to make a website from scratch and publish it to the web, I took a lead over all the criticism.

But the criticism did not stop there. It wanted me to further improve my communication skills. I coded a little more harder. Picked another course on web development to learn a new programming skill called as ‘Nodejs’. It also drastically impacted my life.

But, still the criticism did not lower any bit. I did not stop on these blows and kept on making good websites.

This cycle of responding to criticism with programming and colouring pages, helped me get a little more ahead of these people. I managed to further my self esteem, gain self confidence and each day my speech started getting better. The construction of sentences, their meanings and purpose was all there. I started gaining momentum.

The habit of coding every day with the collaboration of communities like getmakerlog.com where I found more people like me, I managed to give my life a direction. People who were criticising me in 2017, are still criticising me. But their criticism has made me run zakatlists.com better. For example I am about to launch the next thoroughly thought-out upgrade of this website.

The presence of programming skill, has made it easier for me to move around with all the criticism.

Should you find people to criticise you?

No.. Do not find criticism. It is the natural response of every good thing you do consistently, non stop and most part of your lives. You do not have to find for it. You have to find the purpose in your life, that gives your life a meaning. As soon as you start walking on this purpose, your life will start getting successful. You will have more skills, confidence and strength to keep walking with your head held high.

Conclusion

To improve the communication skills, we need to work on giving meaning to our life. A purpose, that defines us. Purpose, agenda of life, resolutions and hobbies are these small ingredients that make our speeches interesting and meaningful.

You want to talk about colors; you can start with a resolution to paint the street in your neighbourhood with colors of your choice. As soon as you start painting one street with bright colors, you will find more streets. Each street will have people to repel you. The fight and hardened resolute to paint the streets, will improve your vocabulary, skill set and self esteem. You will start painting better, your choice of colors will improve and the people who repel you, will keep on acting reactive, repulsive and abusive.

In order to rise in this world, we need to have good communication skills, followed by a physical skill set that raises you in your society and before all these skills, a purpose. The one purpose that gives your life a meaning.

No good is there in much of their private conversation, except for those who enjoin charity or that which is right or conciliation between people. And whoever does that seeking means to the approval of Allah - then We are going to give him a great reward.
- Surah Al Nisa verse 114